Finnish Cross Necklace
by hetacat500
Summary: Peter an average twelve year old boy has his life and family shaken as a tragic experience many have gone through before and many will go through again but will he and everything he holds dear truly make it out?
1. Chapter 1

It was a soft spring day. Peter was in his room playing on his laptop all of a sudden a loud crash shook the house, startled he assumed it was nothing and returned to his laptop.

Moments after the thud a loud shriek broke through the house and from the sound Peter presumed it came from the same place as the crash. In a swift movement his laptop was closed and he was on his feet ready to run to the loud sounds and figure out what had happened, but just as he was inches from the door his "mother" Tino had his hand restraining Peter from the door.

"I'm sorry honey there's nothing to worry about just stay in here for the time being okay?" "um..." but before Peter could register his door was shut and his mother was gone so Peter had no choice but to resume to his laptop.

After about a half an hour Peter's door was opened by none other than his mother though something was wrong... 'wait why is mom crying? oh god is some one hurt?' these thoughts though were soon interupted by Tino whose voice had become a little croaky from his silent sobs.

"Um Peter s-sit down... um you know how some people get sad?" Peter nodded "and how most get over it and feel b-better but how some don't?" Peter nodded slower mentally preparing for the worse."well sometimes Peter, people l-lose hope in becoming happy and some go so far as t-to..." Tino took a moment from talking to silently sob into Peter.

Peter had already figured out what his mother was trying to say: someone in our family just did something harmful to them self that resulted in their death that was what that thump was, and the shrill, piercing, cry of sorrow and anguish was he knew it wasn't Tino who made the cry and it couldn't have been his father because the voice was to high pitched.

'Oh god who would have done that?! it wasn't dad right? no, if Berwald had killed himself Tino wouldn't be mentally stable enough for this conversation. well if mom or dad didn't do it who did?' Tino started to regain his control enough to continue explaining suicide to the 12 year old.

"Well um i-it seems that your uncle Mathias was o-one of those p-people. he h-hung himself in his bedroom and no one k-knew until your uncle Lukas found him dead..." Tino grabbed Peter in a warm embrace, Peter could feel his mother's warm, wet, tears against his neck. within moments he too was tearing up. There they stayed holding each other, mother and son, sobbing over the death of a loved one.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been almost a week since Matthias' suicide, and the weight of the tragic event still had the family grasped within it's effects.

For starters no one had smiled- even Tino, who would usually try and comfort everybody in this sort of event, just kept a straight face. Berwald took this even harder though, Matthias being the elder brother who had raised him. And even if they didn't always see eye to eye, he still loved him and is heart broken to have lost the brother he had known for so long.

Today was the day of the funeral though. Peter sat on a chair by the dinning table he was already to go, he already had his black suit on and gloves. "Mom? are we gonna go soon?" "Yes, Peter. Just be patent" Peter nodded, 'man this is just so unreal, uncle Matthias seemed so...Happy. Though like mom explained sometimes it's hard to know if someone is thinking thoughts like that' "Peter we're ready to go." "coming mom." Peter walked over to his mother and father, who were also wearing black suits, and the three of them walked out the door and into the car the Family shared.

Peter sat in the very back next to his uncle Emil who was silently sulking and refusing to talk to anyone, usually Peter would bug him until he talked but for once Peter was fine with his uncle's muteness because truthfully, Peter didn't feel like talking either in fact, no one did.

After the silent journey they where at a white building. As Peter looked up a cold drop hit his eye 'hmm the weatherman said it would be sunny but that was when i thought my life was perfect and i was naive...' Peter looked at the dark grey sky and sighed."Peter, come on let's get this done with before the rain gets worse."

Peter watched and sobbed as they lowered the lifeless body into the 6 foot trench what bothered him most was how Matthias looked without a smile... almost like he was sleeping but even then Peter would see a smile.

it became so heart wrenching to watch that Peter had no choice but to close his tear stained eyes, only to open them up again at a cry all to similar to the one he recalled from the tragic event that had taken place just a little under a week ago.

when he opened his eyes he saw a flash of black then a gut churning crunch. he then saw almost everyone gasp or peer over the edge of the soon to be grave. Peter too was peering down shocked to see not only one but two bodies one of the dane the other was his uncle Lukas as he could tell by the hair clip laying by Peter's feet.

'it must have fallen out while he was running' he then turned to see Emil next to him, tears streaming down his face at the sight of his mangled brother and the dane who was like a father to the teen. Emil then reached down by Peter's feet and picked up the clip, he then fell to his knees and screamed in anguish and pain to the gods demanding why they would do such things to his innocent family. Peter just watched any part of his heart remaining was smashed at the sight all Peter could do was sob.


	3. Chapter 3

It had been 2 weeks since Matthias' (and Lukas') funeral. Tino and Berwald had Peter signed up for therapy they had tried to get it for Emil too but the teen refused. It was Peter's 3rd session and the therapist grew worried about how Peter talked about the others' problems in stead of his own but Peter thought everyone should worry more about Emil instead.

It was Emil who had watched his only real parental figures die and whenever the subject would even come up Emil would leave for long periods of time and Peter knew he was Self harming Peter had SEEN the scars and he knew that Emil was using these 'absences' to do just that just to attempt suicide and Peter was worried.

Peter was looking up how to help a suicidal teen on google during one of these 'absences' but none of the results seemed helpful in the least. Peter finally gave up and decided to tell his parents what really was going on with the teen but he got rid of the idea almost instantly.'Emil needs help but what do i do? and who would blame him he's basically an orphan now and he watched his only parental figures leave him WILLINGLY he must think they didn't love him.but i should tell my parents this isn't right he shouldn't do this! but what about mom and dad? they aren't mentally stable enough to deal with this not after what's happened within this past month! well if i can't help him and they can't help him then who will? if no one tries to help then Emil... NO!'

"I have to do something!" Peter said his final thought out loud as he raced down the hall to Emil's room 'Shit! the door's locked from the inside i can't get in it won't budge! NO! there's still hope!' Peter mustered all the Prepubescent strength he had to try and kick down the door before it was too late! "one... two... THREE!" Peter had made a foot sized hole in the bedroom door just large enough for him to fit his hand in and unlock the door from the inside.

"Emil!" The teen didn't move from his desk, Peter could see the room was a mess and so was Emil his hair untidy and poorly kept his shirt covered in blood and sweat, and his floor had spots of blood, some old some new. Peter could also see an empty box of razor blades on the desk from his spot by the door.

"Emil! Please don't do this!" Emil finally turned around in one of his self inflicted scarred hands he held a large kitchen knife, in the other Lukas' old hair pin."my family is dying around me and i'm not going to sit down and take it!" "Emil don't do this you don't understand!" "I don't understand?! No Peter, you don't understand! you don't know how it feels to watch your only parental figures leave you, knowing you'll never see them again and not only that, but do it WILLINGLY! WILLINGLY! PETER I'D BE HAPPY IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE PAIN OF HAVING YOUR FAMILY SHOW YOU HOW MUCH THEY 'LOVE' YOU BY LEAVING YOU ALONE LIKE THIS WILLINGLY!" "Emil please!" "NO PETER THERE'S NOTHING FOR ME ANYMORE! I'M ALONE I HAVE NO ONE!" "No E-Emil you're n-not alone! you still have Berwald and Tino! and y-you still have m-me!"

Peter tried to reason Emil out of suicide but Emil wouldn't take reason. Peter wouldn't be able to cope with another family member kill them self "E-Emil, PLEASE!" peter was starting to cry he tried not to but the tears kept coming Emil was sobbing harder.

"NO PETER! THEY WHERE NEVER THERE FOR ME LIKE MATTHIAS OR LUKAS! AND THEY NEVER WILL BE SO JUST GIVE UP ALREADY!" Emil drew the blade closer to his pale, scarred skin threatening to pierce through and end it "Emil please you still have so much you can't do this!" "PETER STOP TRYING TO FIX WHAT'S ALREADY BROKEN!" "p-please..."

it was too late Emil already stabbed through his wrist and hit the dirty floor with a hard thud blood gushing out onto the floor his face became paler, and paler as more and more red liquid oozed onto the floor like lava. Finally his grasp on the knife and clip finally gave way as the last of his blood left the fatal wound.

"E-Emil... no..." Peter's tears streamed hot against his cheeks as he clutched the bloodied shirt on the limp body. Tears mixing in blood with each of Peter's trembling sobs "Peter! Wait why are you- NO! Berwald g-get in here..." Tino stood by the doorway as his husband came rushing in as fast as he could "Tino?! What's wrong? w-why are you shaking?! What's wrong with Peter?!"Tino just pointed to Emil's limp body and Peters trembling one "Peter! w-what happened?!" the boy just shook his head as Berwald gaze hit the knife and fatal stab wound emptied of blood.

"Peter, i-it's o-okay... he's in V-Valhalla with Matthias and Lukas now h-he's in a better place..." He motioned for his spouse to come over and they sat on the bloody floor in a circle of shaking sobbing bodies after the death of another. After that it was just the three of them... _alone_...


	4. Chapter 4

Peter was losing himself. He couldn't stop thinking about Emil, it had only been a week since the teen killed himself right before the younger boy's eyes. And no matter how many times Tino and Berwald told him it wasn't his fault, Peter knew it was. 'I could've done more... i could've grabbed the knife before he did it... but I just stood there and argued. That probably made him want to do it more...' And over and over again Emil's final words replayed in his mind... "stop trying to fix what's already broken..." Peter knew he was right. that Peter couldn't fix his broken family, that he couldn't bring back Matthias, or Lukas, or Emil. But he still had Tino and Berwald and that had to count for something... right?

Why did Matthias have to hang himself? Now our whole family is falling apart. the history our heritage has been stitching for 100's of years is coming apart at the seams. No it's not his fault nor Lukas' or Emil's. It's no ones... this was going to happen at some point...' "BUT WHY NOW?!" Peter couldn't stop the words or tears from flowing he succumbed to the sobs, he didn't have the strength to fight his childish instinct to curl up, his knees to his chest laying on his side, and cry. He knew crying like a little kid wouldn't help anything, but he couldn't help it. Because no matter how strong he tried to be he was still nothing more than a kid. A kid who just a month ago would have been in the park with his uncle, having the time of his life. 'but how can i do that now? my uncle is dead, all of them...

Peter's crying was stopped abruptly by a knock at the front door. Peter got up to answer it wiping away his snot and tears as he walked towards the door stopping in front of it, turning the knob slowly. "W-Who is it?" Peter asked trying to keep his voice from shaking. "Peter! Peter, I'm so sorry i heard about Emil" At the late teen's name Peter's tears started falling in fresh batches no matter how hard he tried to stop them "Oh come here you poor love! there, there, Arthur's got you... It's okay, let it out..." The taller green eyed brit comforted Peter while holding him in a strong, yet warm embrace. "It's okay Peter, Big brother's got you...

Now Peter I came to speak with your parents do you know where they are?" Peter nodded "Y-Yes, they're d-down the hall in te first b-bedroom on the left, I think..." "Thanks." Arthur stood up, and started toward the hall where peter pointed. "Um Tino? Berwald? um I'm here like we agreed!" "Oh hi Arthur..." Tino came out of the room his eyes and voice dull.

"Oh yes, so i'll be taking Peter for a little bit, while you take some time to recover from this experience right? Like we agreed a week ago?" "Oh yeah... yeah here i packed his bag... just take it." Tino shoves a suitcase into Arthur's hands with a small hint of loathing in his voice. "Okay i'll be back with him soon. And if you need anything, anything at all, just call i'll be there if you need anything and i'l be more than fine returning Peter if you wish to have him back." "Okay... we'll bear that in mind..." "Bye!" "Goodbye mom and dad!" "Bye Peter...

It had been almost a week since Arthur came by to pick up Peter like they had all planned... Tino and Berwald were alone together. Tino was scared he didn't know what to do he had promised to stay around for Peter and Berwald but the voices that told him to give up grew louder... He was going insane he didn't want to leave his child or his spouse but he was losing it how can he comfort when he needs comforting too?

"'I can't do it... what if Peter thinks i don't love him?' 'But you want to! don't you?' 'Yes but that would be cruel and family comes first!' 'Like your strong enough to keep up this 'act' you aren't his mother, or his father! you never gave birth to him! Nor did you fertilize his mothers' seed! you're not even related in the least! you adopted him!' 'Yes but i still love him and what about Berwald?! what would he do?! i can't lose him! i won't!' 'hmm? him? he doesn't love you! he only uses you! he never loved you! how stupid are you?!' 'I-...' 'face it you have nothing! NOTHING!'

"Your right... I know what i have to do..." Tino walked over to his spouse who was reading a book on the couch. "Honey... I can't do this... I-I want to end this misery... i'm sorry! i love you! but I can't do this! p-please forgive me... if i do it!" Tino flung himself onto Berwald, and sobbed.

"I know... I feel the same way... I-I was about to tell you the same thing..." Tino looked up at his lover's face, tears streaming down his shocked face. "R-really?!" "Yes..." "Berwald?" "Yes?" "I'm gonna do it... but I don't want Peter to think we hate him... but I'm losing it I-I'm going insane! and my mental state can't keep this up... I hear voices... And i can't let Peter see me like this... It will hurt me no end. And it would be cruel to force Peter to see this side of me!" "I understand i'm feeling the same way I can't stay like this, but I can't go without you..." "Me neither... Berwald what do you say? End it together?" Tino held out his hand for his spouse to take "Together..." Berwald took his wife's hand.

"Well here we go... I can't believe i'm about to do this... Berwald? are you ready?" "Yes..." "I'll see you in Valhalla..." Tino took Berwald's hand and in the other held a shotgun. "One..." Tino placed his gun in his mouth. Berwald did the same. "Two..." Tino said the word clearly through the gun. as he said this the guns clicked, getting ready to make the fatal shot. "Three...

Shot...


	5. Chapter 5

Peter had just waken up. It took him a few moments to remember why he was in a white bedroom instead of the pale blue one he was used too. he also was a little frightened then he realized he was in Arthur's guestroom and had been for the past week. He got up to change when he also realized he only had one pair of clothes and needed more. "Arthur?" "Oh Peter what is it?" Arthur was sitting in his chair sipping his morning tea and reading his favorite Charles Dickens book: 'The parish boy's progress' or 'Oliver Twist' "Um mom only packed on pair of clothes..." "Oh! well give me a sec..." Arthur marked his page and set the book down before standing up and running into his bedroom returning moments later with a faded tee shirt. "Here, use this for now while i go and pick up some of your clothes, Okay?" Peter nodded pulling the old shirt over his head. "Good, I'll be back within the hour." And with that Arthur closed the door to head of to what had become of the warm household where a nice family once lived.

Arthur gets out of his car and goes up to the door and knocks. "Hello? are you guys home? i see your car parked. Hello?!" Arthur tries the door again it was unlocked so he decided to let him self in. "Tino? Berwald? I'm sorry to be a trouble but i just came to get Peter some more clothes! Are you guys even home?!" 'Hmm i guess they took a walk or some thing...' Arthur grabbed some of Peter's clothes from the boy's closet and putting them in a shopping bag. "Hmm that's odd they're bedroom door is open... maybe there's something that explains where they are..." Arthur Opened the door all the way and what he saw truly horrified him: instead of the usual soft white curtains they where bloodstained and on the floor he saw 2 people holding hands with similar head injuries surrounded by blood. Arthur recognized the 2 almost immediately. "No, no, no,no,no Tino, Berwald! NO! they did it i can't believe it they really did it..." Arthur began to tremble as he dropped to his knees and started to cry, hot tears running down his soft cheeks. 'How will i ever tell Peter...' Arthur then took out his cellphone and dialed someone he knew could help "Yo dude? wazzup? wait, bro are you cryin'?" "A-Alfred... they're dead... Peter's parents are dead..." "Woah... bro i'll be right over i'll call Mattie!" "Alfred? how do i tell him? he has lost his whole family in a month... How?!" "I-I don't know maybe you should show them to him..." "what are you mad!?" "No if you tell him he'll want to see so show him, they were HIS parents!" "F-fine but he should have support..." "Well me and Mat will be over soon i'll call Jett and Feli to see if Marcello and Anaise can come over to give Peter some friendly support i'll also bring Morro I think Peter and him are friends but i don't know... He usually keeps to himself." Thanks Alfred. welp i guess i have to go tell Peter the news... Alfred how did this happen?" "I don't know bro..." "Bye" "Bye, bro" Arthur hung up placing his phone in his pocket before reaching don and pulling Berwald's glasses off and un clipping Tino's cross necklace. Placing both objects in the grocery bag along with a picture of the family before this all happened. 'Oh Peter... I'm so sorry...'

Peter was sitting at the table eating a Swedish candy bar, waiting for Arthur to return. 'it's been 2 hours! is he okay did something happen?' Peter's thoughts were interrupted by a door being opened slowly. "Oh hey Arthur. What took so long i was getting worried..." Arthur didn't respond. "Arthur? what happened?!" Arthur walked over to Peter still not talking took the boy's hand and placing in it a metal chain and a pair of eyeglasses. Peter opened his hand recognizing the necklace and glasses and whose they were. "Arthur these are my parents' h-how did you get these?" Peter already knew the answer... "Peter i found them dead on the floor together they killed them selves i'm so, so sorry." Peter collapsed into Arthur's arms and chest his screams muffled but audible, his body shaking with sobs. "Peter it's okay..." "Let me see them..." Peter's words were muffled his head still in Arthur's chest. "Peter? what? can you repeat that?" Peter sat up and stared the brit in the face and spoke clearly. "Let me see my parents." "Fine, but it will be hard to take in..." "I'll be fine, it's nothing worse than what i've seen before..." "Fine but I don't want you to see them alone..."

Peter was walking through his house or what was his house, now it was a quiet lifeless shell of what once was a place of fun and love, now a place of ...loneliness. He walked down the hall, that felt so foreign. Regardless of the 100's of times he had walked down it before. His elder brother and 2 best friends were there with him to support him, but he didn't need it. Peter soon reached a door, the door his parents once shared, now where they rested until a hearse would come and take them to a funeral home and then they would be buried this would be the last time Peter would see them and he was prepared to see blood and gore but what he wasn't prepared for was how when he opened the door it looked as though his parents were sleeping he could only know they were dead by their pale skin and lack of a heart beat. When he saw this he lost his self restraint "MOM! DAD! NO NO MOM PLEASE DAD!" Peter ran to his parents trying desperately to wake them up and realize he was imagining it. But this was no dream. His friends tried to pull him away but were stopped by Arthur "No let him mourn properly..." But Peter was to sad to notice "MOM... DAD... PLEASE W-WAKE UP... Y-you can't be dead... you just can't..." "Peter I'm sorry I really am" "no NO! PLEASE I-I NEED YOU GUYS! P-PLEASE..." Peter gave up his attempts to wake his parents up, they were gone all he could do was say goodbye... He sobbed clutching his mother's necklace remembering what he told him years ago "See this Peter? This necklace has been in my family for generations it's an old Finnish cross that was crafted by my great, great, great,great grandfather over 200 years ago and someday it will be yours." 'I thought it would be longer before i inherited though' Peter cried for what seemed like hours before kissing his parents for the last time and leaving the flowers he had brought for them in the space in between their bodies right above their joined hands. "Goodbye mom, Goodbye dad, say hi to Emil and Matthias and Lukas for me when you reach Valhalla... I love you guys and your memories will always live on... I Promise..." Peter left still clutching the necklace and he kept his promise and when he grew older he still kept it and the glasses, and the hairpin, and Emil's bow, and Matthias' Axe as well as the photo and

"I Promise..."


End file.
